from: Mugtoe

Where do you send Jews with ADD? A concentration camp

What's better than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

What's the difference between an onion and a dead hooker? I cried when i cut up the onion.

what do women and rocks have in common? if they're flat, you can skip them

How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? give the bitch a shovel

Why did the feminist cross the road? to SUCK MY DICK

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Two: one to change the lightbulb and another to SUCK MY DICK

what's brown and sticky? a stick

A pregnant woman was at the hospital giving birth to her baby. The delivery was almost complete, and at long last, the doctor held up the newborn, cut the umbilical cord, and took a moment to look the baby over. Then without missing a beat, the doctor threw the child against a nearby wall with all of his might. The mother watched in shock as the baby slid to the floor with a sickening thud. The nurses and orderlies stood-by agast as the doctor proceeded to dribble the newborn around the room like a soccer ball before finally passing the baby through the door into the hall with a mighty kick. Everyone, including the fatigued mother, chased the doctor into the hall just in time to see him scoop up the infant and run down the coridor, stopping just long enough to bodycheck the child into the wall every so often. At the end of the hall, the doctor gave a mighty leap and slam-dunked the baby into a nearby trashcan, giving himself a load roar of approval. Finally the now quite large awe-struck crowd caught up with the doctor. "Why? Why in the ever loving name of God did you do that to my baby?" cried the mother. The doctor said, "Bah, I'm just fucking with you, it was born dead".

Why can't Ray Charles read ? Because he is black

Did you know that Princess Di was on the radio? Yup, as well as the dashboard, the steering column, the windshield, etc...

What was JFK jr. drinking when his plane went down? Ocean Spray

A little girl is standing there watching her mummy getting changed for the bingo. First the mummy takes her bra off, exposing her boobies. "Mummy, mummy, what are those?" "these are boobies, dear. You'll get some when in about 7 years when your a big girl" So the mother takes off her skirt and knickers revelaing her bushy beaver "mummy, mummy, whats are those?" "these are pubic hair dear, you get these when you get your boobies" The little girl is content and wanders into the bathroom where her father is getting out of the shower. She looks at his penis and says "daddy, daddy, when will i get one of those?" "In about an hour when mummy is out at the bingo"

what do you do when you see a woman lying in a ditch on the side of the road? nothing, what's she doing out of the kitchen..?

why do women have small feet? so they can stand closer to the counter.



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