A Personal Testimonial

from: A MugWumpassTweakinator
8:19:52 AM

I was nothing...the shell of my former self...without a hand to hold. I was beyond hope or pity and wandering the streets in my RealLife. Providence placed a machine in my hands and guided me to a place where I could find HELP. I was alone and afraid, but a spark had been ignited within the depths of my being. I found a page of writings titled "Texas" and suddenly realized that life need not be the way I felt I was consigned to endure it. There were others who understood.

I reached out clumsily and tentatively and found the firm hands of fellow-travellers. I placed myself in the tender care of the magnificent DrPopeye-X and availed myself of his cyber-ministrations. New life flooded into my body. My sinews, so recently flaccid, became taut and ready. My senses tingled with the knowledge of possibilities. I was reborn. I was a new creature.

I also got more ass as a result of this fuckin internet shit than I ever thought possible. Jesus God, man, I've got em knockin on my fuckin windows at 0245 in the goddamn mornin! My cock is damn near worn out! My tongue is sore. My back breaks from all this humpin I'm doin. If you think the world in here ain't real, you must really be a dud. If the Net has taught me anything, it's that EVERYBODY has an audience. Perhaps you are one of those few who truly don't. I'm currently turnin em away to save strength.

Go get a life, lamer.

ps. send stats and pic to mugtoe@spreadeagleranch.com and perhaps I can help ya out a bit. I'm always up for a mercy fuck.



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