sob

sob

from: Ed_Zeppelin
10/19/01
4:12:24 AM
64.12.96.231

Look at the fucking time. I'm sitting up crying over the loss of one of the great innovations of all time, Elixir classical guitar strings. They make them with a coating ("Polyweb" by Gore, the same folks who brought you Gore-tex) that fills in the little spaces between the windings so your fingers don't make that "vvvffft" sound when they move around. Guess there weren't enough mutants like me out there to buy them. Honest to Pete, these things made my nipples stick out like pencil erasers, I got so excited. They still make them for acoustic, electric, bass, mandolin, etc. but no more nylon classical strings. Hot tears of bitterness course down my cheeks leaving wet slug-trails as a reminder of my shattered heart, my broken defeated brain ponders the question again and again; 'why?' It's time, Doc. Pull the plug. Tell T&T that I still spoke ill of them at the end and grabbed my prodigious plonger, waved it at my bedside pic of their tits and said "ruffle THIS, ya cunts." Well, thinking that brought a smile to my face, and a burning desire to live on. I want to do that to them in person. (It really IS prodigious, y'know.) I have a dream now. Oh thank you so much, you've helped me more than I can ever tell you. How much do I owe you?

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