The Bible Was Written By
A Bunch Of Bald Headed
Fan Club Nazis

from: slack jockey infomania
Its all about shoving your philosophy down someone's throat BEFORE they shove theirs down yours. Whoever yells the loudest and talks the fastest wins. You've got to have the book written, and in place, established permanently. Something has to hold the fort together over the course of many generations and cultural mutations, and it turns out everything in the world is slowly coming unglued, and all the components are gradually separating back into their original elements, only this time they can't be combined any more, they're "played out", and all those parts, one by one are being washed away and dissolved into infinite dixie dust and itchy crab nebulas, covering the scrotums of time/space with the footprints of the Xtra-Terrestical, you know that space dude with 3 balls? They call him XT (not ET), and Close Encounters With The 3rd Kind was actually a "testicle cuddling" cult, and they have lights in the end of their dicks, not their index fingers. Instead of shining a light and saying "home", they come right to the point and say "I want to fuck your brains out" until you reach the Third Stone From The Cum, and at that point, finally unleash the juice. That 3rd nut will automatically squeeze out every last drop, but you simply must apply proper compression and pud poundage to PUSH it out, in pulsing waves. Then slam it home. THAT'S an Encounter so Close, I'm sure its of the TURD Kind. But that's not my concern, I prefer all my fudgesicles to come from the freezer, not the skeezer. Follow me? I don't like Dung in my Dungarees neither. Its nasty stuff. I just know it couldn't be good for you. Now, maybe if it smelled like roses at all times, thanks to a constant spraying with industrial strength GLADE. That's all the Bible is really, just a blast from a real long winded can of GLADE, or "camel gas", if you prefer. Without the fan club nazis out in full force, all of that would fade away, its only natural. The only choice available, in the final analysis, is preservation of data over time, and that means "The BOOK", or The Bible as it is usually called. The genius of it lies purely in the fact that its so established, we'll never get rid of it now.



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