From: the Beast replies
to one of my emails

it was HIM, ol' 666, actually the wannabe Three Toed Sloth, the Sub-Taylor, shall we call him that? ...oh, hell, it was CURETON... he's buggin' a little bit.... it was the artwork I have called "portrait of a masterpiece... free ticket to prison" on the post: ITS ONE OF THOSE "GOTCHA" THINGS the artwork depicts an image made from a SonyRMX-100digitalmixer, the SAME ONE as you can see at Edit Point, one way you can tell these guys are LAMERZ is the way they shop for gear,

"I just got the call, I went to EBAY and picked out the biggest thing that matched the amount of money stolen, I didn't really know what the difference was between the different software since I've never used anything before at all, there was one thing that claimed to emulate the classic "24 track metaphor", and the board has 48 channels w/25 motorized faders, those are for "playback" "wow" "amazing" what does Pro Tools run for? What does Pro Tools do? "I don't know, I didn't bother to read up or ever use it, so who knows?" "all I know is we gotta do this deal INSTANTLY" "you mean we waited all these months, wearing out ADAT's trying to use VHS decks as sample accurate hard drives, and suddenly, without any warning we have to go to EBAY and do a "Buy Now" ASAP on the QT?" don't you already have 2 yamaha 01's? that makes a total of 32 motorized faders, right? Right. So you already have 32 and you went EBAY for the big score and it was actually LESS than what you already have?

Don 't you get it, fool? This is STOLEN money, we gotta spend it to buy something QUICK!

But doesn't that guy with the big head have a 24 channel Mackie mixer? --- Yes.

So you actually already have 32 channels plus 24 channels? Yeah, that's 56 channels
between us if we use the equipment we bought with our money.

Sorry, I gotta use this 48 channel, its smaller, but at least it was bought with stolen money, I need it more if its stolen...

Ok, what do you need it more for?

 Uh, Two Tons Of Steel
and Eve Unbound.

Are you telling me you actually risked getting a free ticket to prison just so you could record Two Tons Of Steel and Eve Unbound with LESS CHANNELS?

Yeah, I know what you're saying, but that's all there is, besides, since the money is stolen, these two groups are recording FOR FREE.

 I see, its like trying to work your way up thru the social circle buy paying for bands' studio time with stolen money?


What's the name of the album?


This is a joke, right? -- No?

No wonder they think you're so wonderful, you pay for everything and do all the work, THANKS FOR BANKROLLING OUR ENTIRE ALBUM, of course you can do the artwork so there are credits with your name all over the cover, right?

 Thanks, that's all I need at the moment, something that gives the false impression I played with these cats several times, one credit for each time I didn't actually play anything.

"What did you do?"

I bought the shit on EBAY
...with stolen money

No, I mean, on the album?"

I paid for it, so by doing the artwork I am the person who makes the actual credits, you know, the letters on the cover... Look at these big names I've worked with.

So that explains why when you look at the cover, you don't even notice the name of the band or the musicians who played, instead you see YOUR name, over and over, one time for each thing you DIDN'T actually play on?

So you gave yourself a credit for giving yourself a credit?

Why shouldn't I? I paid for the whole album, didn't I?

(then in unison with nodding heads):

"with stolen money..."

if anyone thinks this is a joke, go ahead and laugh,
it relieves tension, but this is NOT A JOKE,
this is the
see this gear at Edit Point Studio, San Antonio, Texas,
the names weren't changed to protect the guilty



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