what is a real christian?

from: popeye-x
15 Mar 2008
05:47:52 -0600

perhaps a better description might be "he's not merely a christian", he's a spiritual leader with his own music ministry. let me explain the way it works: you get hooked up with somebody who's "connected" on the church, this fellow christian lets it be known that so-and-so would be interested in "sowing a seed for harvest", but its got to be "legit" on the surface enough to make the tax write off function with no snags from the IRS. so the "connected church person" who's gonna hook claude up and get some of those bills squared away also happens to be in charge of the church's "ministry outreach program", how about if rev. butch flies down to south america, all expenses paid, and sings songs with christian youths around a campfire, while the church he's from helps them build a cinder block building the church is donating, you know, to go beyond the tithe to the "first fruits" and hell, between plane tickets, food, lodging, cinder blocks, shipping of building materials, and the various logistics involved and prohibitive costs when you have to pay "retail", it really makes a lot more sense for the church to have its own plane. why not? i goes good with their own in-houae television production facilities... what i am driving at here is a very simple concept: "speaking of driving, what are you driving to the praise-a-thon campout this weekend, rev. butch?" well, compared to all these other millions of dollars, getting you a proper van to haul a proper P.A to your praise and worship sing-a-longs will be no problemo... but of course you must do the little south america "tour" on the cheap, know what i'm sayin'? that's right, "you don't get paid, otherwise a certain person can't write it off as non-profit, follow me?" popeye-x may be a satan following frieghtrain headed straight for hell, but i know there's no law that says you have to be "non-prophet", right? PRAISE THE LORD!! and basically, that's why the band has to play gigs for free.... you do believe in jesus, don't you? i will pray that GOD will raise you higher than a mere "beezlebub idolizer", you know, get you right with the Lord and the church so that rev. butch gets everything for free... including a live touring band that rehearses regularly, "monday, 4pm", does shows, "wednesday, thursday, and next sunday, we're driving to a church in el paso, do you need a ride? you can just hop in the equipment van". wow, this is really fantastic, i'm a grown up now, with no paying gigs, and i've finally made it to the level where i started out as a teenager, sleeping in equipment vans and sittin' round the campfire, doin' a sing-a-long for JESUS-UH!!!!!! and we're recording a CD, too? cool, we have some good tunes... no? not the tunes we play at shows? not the tunes the audience claps for and comes to hear live? what songs? oh, i see, these are special songs no one in the band has heard YET, but we're so successful, the rehearsals to learn this unknown music in time for our upsoming ALBUM is spinning my head around so fast, i forgot to ask... what's my cut of this next album? i'd just like to know. if its nothing, just say nothing, that's cool, i would just like to know. i'm not accusing you of ripping me off, of course, i'm simply asking "what do i get out of doing this worK" surely i'm not to impolite to ask this totally normal question during the course of playing many gigs, learning music, and then recording it, even though its music i've never heard, so i can't really say i know ANY TITLES, ANY LYRICS, ANY NOTES, ANY RHYTHMIC PAARTICULARS... in fact i know nothing at all, except rehearsals start monday, 4pm... can't you just answer my question? how about you other guys in the band, don't you wanna know what your piece of the pie is? "yeah, as a matter of fact we would". only then does the great spiritual sing-a-long crusader for christ feel it isn't beneath him to answer a simple question: "that's to be worked out later" in the sweet by and by... like how jesus might tarry, so what is that to you? (this has all been a true story... all of it really happened. sounds like s REAL CHRISTIAN to me, sounds exactly like a REAL CHRISTIAN. no, i WILL NOT stand in a circle and hold hands for the band's pre-gig prayer, asking jesus to help us do what he wants, and not what we want... thy will be done? thy will WON'T be done, motherfucker, neither will thy album. hey, if the band's CD chooses to tarry, what is that to you? get thee behind me you twisted satanical half pint, and stab me in the back as deep as you can, because when i turn around and see your ass running into the sunset as fast as it will go, maybe, just maybe, i will ask GOD to forgive you when i put my foot in your ass !!!! mr. lying for jesus and fucking over musicians just so you can get up there at the microphone and sing another completely stupid cliche ridden portrait of your wonderful SELF, and how you never really understood what grandpa really meant until you went to south ameirca and saw newly saved brownskin savages with no church!!!!! aw, heck, WE MUST BUILD THEM ONE, SO THEY CAN THINK EXACTLY LIKE US! sounds just like a real christian to me, in fact, a kind of amplified christ, like in the amplified bible. you mean you got a free amplifier, too?



21 20 19 18 17 16 15 14 13 12 11 10 X 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1