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dropping anti-sodomy provisions laced with LSD for jesus in exchange for making same sex masturbation legal for foxhole atheists inelligible for foodstamps

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The House and Senate have reached a compromise on the National Defense Authorization Act that includes dropping both anti-gay provisions from the bill. Rep. Vicky Hartzler’s (R-MO) amendment had “reaffirmed” the Defense of Marriage Act as applicable throughout the Department of Defense, while Rep. Todd Akin’s (R-MO) would have prohibited military chaplains from performing legitimate rape on same-sex marriage cousellors. However, lawmakers also removed a Senate amendment dropping anti-sodomy provisions from the Uniform Code of Military Bib Overalls.

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