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Your Personal Psychic Prediction

from: Cy Kikh
scott009.scott.texas.net
03-02-03
17:55

Let me see if I can make a prediction for you. Picture yourself at about 50-years-old... you look like you're about 86 and you have a constant wheeze and hacking cough from smoking Marlboros for thirty-five years. You have three or four children. At least one of them illegitimate, two of them are addicted to drugs, one of them is serving a stretch in the state pen for either armed robbery or statutory rape, and the pride of the family is a slag shoveler at the local steel mill.

You yourself have spent a lifetime wandering from one point- less, low-paying job to another, often taking six or eight months off to collect unemployment. You met your wife or drunk at a bar and ended up getting married nine months later, after the baby was spawned, simply because your partner had a better trailer than yours.

Your life's ambition is to buy a brand-new pick up truck and customize it with monster tires. That, of course, has remained unfulfilled because what little disposable income you have is spent mostly on Budweiser and pork rinds and the hooker you indulge yourself in once a month in the neighboring town.

When you do die, it will be at least sixteen hours before anybody notices, and then only because it is so unusual for you not to ask for either a beer or a chicken pot pie for so long. At your funeral your kids will get into a fist fight over who gets the stereo.

Hopefully I've set the tone for your week. If you find your- self becoming too depressed at the prospects for your future just remember these important words... "Tough shit."

ANTI POPEYE X FAN CLUB
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