I crawl to the kitchen. Nothing to eat. Just a jar of peanut butter and some bread. I make a sandwich. Mmmm, this must be crunchy style. I look at the label on the jar. It says, "HOUSEFLY". There's pictures of Peter Pan and a big fly. I open the jar in disbelief and scoop out some and spread it flat on my hand. All those crunchy nuts were not nuts. They were crunchy houseflies.
I call lawyer. He says I can't sue. The label clearly indicates the word "HOUSEFLY" next to a picture depicting a Housefly Sitting On A Slice Of Bread Rubbing His Tummy And Smiling. The caption reads: "M-m-m-m-m, crunchy!!!" Can't argue with that. Lawyer recommends I check each "chunk", possibly a non-crunchy one can be found, however, litigation will cost millions. Fuck it! I make another sandwich and forget about it.
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