human nature is like a fire... especially if you give it a place to burn
Hate Mail to Dr. Popeye X
HATE MAIL to Dr. Popeye X

why you love to hate popeye-x

The power of editorial omnipotence is like a drug. Sometimes, mere e-mailers think they deserve some say about it, but they don't have the POWER. All they can do is wind up staring down the webmaster's cannon barrel, hurling insults at the warhead that's about to give them a neck stump where their head used to be.

Angry Anarchy Says:
Subject: Fucking Pathetic Lifeless Bastards
Hey all you FUCKING PATHETIC LIFELESS BASTARDS  out there that keep sending hate mail to PPX. First off, you're telling him he has problems, he needs a life, etc. etc. FUCK THAT! You're the fucking morons that don't have a life! If you don't like his fucking website, then don't fucking stay! Move on! If you want all your fucking love filled bullshit, go to for christ's god damn sake, instead of proving that YOU are the ones without a life! How does this work? If you stupid fuckers had a life, you wouldn't spend all that time writing paragraphs of bullshit, when you could easily click the little fucking X at the top right hand corner of the screen. I mean, comon..
PPX isn't telling anybody how to live their life, so don't tell him how to live his. You stupid self centered egotistic fucks!

also a message to PPX. Great website man, keep it up, you're doing great.
I stumbled across your site last night and
haven't stopped reading and looking since! I just clicked into your hate mail page and started reading, those bastards really need to read what i just said. I mean, I finally a website for people like me! I say,
FUCK THE WORLD! and anybody that don't like me saying that, well then FUCK THEM TOO!

-Angry Anarchy
- 03/06/02

Joe said:
Subject: i fucking HATE you
you are so fucking disturbed. GOD, Dr. popwhatever-x, you are so clueless. you need help, totally. if you think that your website discribes life as you know it, you have some sort of problem. from what i read, you are an unloved asshole that doesn't care if an asteroid slams into earth any second or if we are all killed in nuclear war. don't think i am going to read your e-mail because there might be a virus in it. fuck YOU

Dr. Popeye X comments:
I think everything you said was at least .0001% true, but I fail to see why that is so bad for you. What did I do, make fun of your favorite rock group, or something? I like your line, "if you think that your website discribes life as you know it, you have some sort of problem". Its not a problem, if anything, its the solution. You being upset about it shows that you, by definition, are the one who's greatly disturbed. You should read: KILL PAIN WITH KINDNESS TO CREATE GOOD AND DESTROY EVIL! followed by

Joe replies:
if i could tell you how smart i am... well, lets just say that i know how to save the earth from global warming and don't you DARE, and i mean it, dont you DARE laugh at me. you know, i have heard alot of shit in my life, yours scores about 10 out of 10 on the shit-o-meter, quoted from Will Smith in MIB, and lets just say we both have our problems. luckily for me, your e-mail didn't have any viruses on it. listen, kurt, i think that you should change your website and your life. by the way, you didn't make fun of my favorite rock band. i hate music. POST THIS

Dr. Popeye X comments:
Its not funny enough. I did like, "i have heard alot of shit in my life, yours scores about 10 out of 10 on the shit-o-meter", but this is getting ridiculous. Would somebody please enlighten this person? I don't feel like bursting his bubble.

XT says:
You hate music, and you're giving Dr. Popeye X advice on what to do with his website... and his life? Are you really so stupid that you don't know what a fictional character is? The Toiletside Reader is not a
WAY OF LIFE, its just funny stories with artwork, you fucking idiot.

T-Bone says:
here's a reply to your global warming moron I bet you know the solution to global warming. "SHUT YOUR FUCKING CAKEHOLE YOU MORON!" That would save about fifteen thousand calories of hot air leaking out upon the globe right there. And as to the supposed realities contained in the Toiletside Reder website-- maybe you should check the definition of "virtual reality".

Bob says:
I hate people who can't take satire as humor, or use it to expand their own point of view.

Suzi says:
Subject: Fuck Them Whiners!
I know you're digging the pissed off responses!!!

Kyle says:
Subject: brainless dipshit
I'm so smart I don't like music? What a brainless dipshit.

Joe yells:
Subject: Not Funny Enough

Dr. Popeye X replies:
Subject: About ME
Boring information about
YOU is not the point. Humorous promotion of ME is the point.

Dr. Popeye X inquires further:
Subject: you HATE music?
You hate music and think I should change my life? Here's me at work, think I'll ever change?

Joe retorts:
hehehehehe! are you the half-naked hippie in the picture with the fucked-up guitar? HAHAHA! the thought of me talking to a guy like that just makes me laugh!

Dr. Popeye X confirms:
Now you got it. How can I disagree with that? If you don't watch out, Joe, you're going to end up comprehending what I'm all about. For an even better view of my "fucked up guitar", see You called that one right, .0001%. You're probably not as stupid as you act. I guess, since you don't have your own e-mail, you probably don't even own a computer, much less your own website. How can I possibly be mean to someone with a big mouth, and nothing else? Of course, my fans will crucify you, nonetheless, I think
you're funny, but please, stick to the subject, (it ain't YOU, punkydoodle!)

Todd says:
Punkydoodle? Absolutely brilliant. Keep on keepin' on.

XT jumps in:
Fuck this guy!!!
Why are you being nice to him? You're my hero, Dr. Popeye X, but I can't believe you'd be so accomodating to this obviously stupid fuckhead!

Dr. Popeye X replies:
Joe can't help it if he understands me, but doesn't "get it". Give him a chance, he'll come around. If he doesn't, you can slice him like lunchmeat, and maybe he'll go get his own life, and quit worrying about Dr. Popeye X's life so much.

Joe says:
Subject: i think that i came around now
okay, so i guess that i had the wrong impression of you, and you aren't a hippie. you seem kind of cool. by the way, your guitar isn't fucked up. i just said that because i was so mad and couldn't think of any way to insult you further. and another thing- -i like music. sorry Dr. Popeye X. i guess that i was just having a stressful couple of weeks.

Dr. Popeye X concludes:
fuck YOU!

KC says:
Let the flaming begin. Some people just don't get it, do they? I believe we used to call people like that,
Lungy. I guess this is the kind of shit that happens when cousins marry. Chug baby.

Subject: Go fuck YOURSELF!
Besides the fact that your parents were obviously alcoholics who neglected you for extended periods of time - your existence in this world is meaningless. I don't exactly understand your endless pages of NOTHING - but who cares, obviously it makes sense to you. They must be your cry for help. If writing your pointless satires enlightens someone enough to write your sorry ass back (like me) - maybe you are getting your cup filled, drop by pathetic drop. Obviously that's all you need to exist or shall I say subsist in your world. I think you must have come to a point in your life where the only way to keep on dealing with the fucked up things that happened to you when you were a young'n is to put up this "FUCK THE WORLD" atttitude and hide behind your misery. If only you had someone who loved you or even just a little self-esteem you could turn the computer off and live a real life. By the way, you're not twisted... although you probably want people to think that. You're just fucking STUPID! By the way... certainly you could be more creative than tiling a single picture for your background... If you ever want a way out of your HELL... just let someone HUG your pathetic ass!

Dr. Popeye X comments:
I appreciate this comment so much. You've done the "homework", and written it very well. Every single thing you said was not only true, its funny! Unlike me, you obviously come from super intelligent, totally straight parents. Not to shift the blame, but check out in your spare time. There's too many good lines in your comment for me to single one out, they're all pretty good. I really do want a way out of my HELL... but I'm kinda shy, maybe it'd be best if I let you KISS my pathetic ass, you little brat. Besides, I don't HUG, I FUCK.

Doc says:
Subject: I love your hate mail!
Hey Popeye, I love the hate mail page! What normal human spends the time to spew three paragraphs of that trash, instead of just moving on to the next website? You're doing a great job exposing future Republicans. I especially liked the comment from the
angry lesbian: "By the way... certainly you could be more creative than tiling a single picture for your background..." LMAO! That's gotta hurt, eh? I notice none of these idiots leave their own URL. Guess they are too busy whining relentlessly to make their own website. Keep up the good work!

Kyle says:
Great comments from your readers! If you are so "pathetic", why are they reading your stuff?

HELLISSA replies:
I must disclose to you, before you continue reading, it is possible to become addicted to feedback supplied by me. Proceed with extreme caution, a box of kleenex, and a condom on. First of all, you broke rule #1... It is unethical, illegal, and chicken shit to alter, add, delete or expand on previously posted comments! Second of all, your theory is wrong. I hardly think the things I said were "cute". I can only agree that I am a "smart-ass bitch". But you'll have that. Thirdly, don't be scared! I can take it, tough stuff. Although you would probably like a response to your comments posted regarding my letter... as you know, you are currently in violation of rule #1... so try again SAILOR BOY! P.S. It is not my fault you were not allowed to listen to Kenny Rogers. There's still hope, Smart Ass Bitch.

Dr. Popeye X comments:
I didn't break rule #1, I AM rule #1. Kenny Rodgers is definitely your fault, just like background image tiling, its all your fault! You being "cute" is not a theory, its a fact, I've seen your picture, so shut up. By the way, how'd ya like those new edits?

HELLISSA replies again:
Please forward this on to Doc...
You fucking idiot... How did you get so STUPID? Did you not see the words at the top of the page? It says Hate Mail not warm fucking fuzzies. If he wanted to be pet and praised it would say so. He wants to be criticized, cut-down, and manipulated. I am sorry you can't figure complicated things like this out. Let it also be noted, you chicken shit, that you also did not leave an address. I might be the idiot who spewed out three paragraphs of crap... but you are a bigger fuck-off for reading it, thinking about it, and responding to it. I will leave saying again, HOW DID YOU GET SO FUCKING STUPID?

Dr. Popeye X comments:
Hey, Doc, didn't I say she was cute! I took out all the addresses, you'll have to fight through me and my editing. By the way, Doc is an Internet Genius, go see his website at UNSPEAKABLY STUPID STORIES
. You can certainly find him there. His stories are funny as a motherfucker, and he's had about 16,000 hits in 2 months. Nobody writing on the Net can match that, not that I know of. Watch out Melissa, I've seen Doc take on assholes before, at his other discussion website, AMISH RAKE FIGHT Trust me, little Smart-Assed Bitch, Doc will give you a black eye on your anal spot, lickity split! You have been warned!

HELLISSA replies again:
I do not give a shit what Doc can do to my ass. If people are waiting in line to talk on his site, why is he visiting others? Maybe because one of his many personalities is the one with the 16.2 billion hits on his site. However, he is welcome to bring it on... I'm not scared!

Suzi says:
God, this is better than Springer. And I'm bettin' she isn't an angry young lesbian at all. More like an
angry old cross-dressing greenpeace fag.

Dr. Popeye X asks:
Hey, Hellissa! Where's my favorite CUNT? We miss you in here! I guess she got scared of Dr. Popeye X. That always happens, no matter how nice I am.

Dr. Popeye X insists:
Whatever happened to Megabitch Hellissa? Aw, heck, she CHICKENED OUT! I knew she was a lilly-livered, 09-er, big-mouthed, raisin-balled, chickenshit, snot-nosed brat. She ain't so fuckin' tough. She probably wasn't HUGGED enough, and she started CRYING for her Daddy to save her.

Mistina says:
Subject: Your Stinking Webpage
All I can say is you are one sick nut. As one of God's children, I would like to wish you well, but with a distorted mind like you have, it will be very unfortunate if a freight train missed you today.

Dr. Popeye X comments:
Thank you, another satisfied customer, only you don't realize it… yet. As far as the freight train goes, it has a headlight, and that's the light you see at the end of your tunnel. How can it hit me if I'm driving it?

Spyder Zero sez:
I know you just wanna fuck him.

Suzi sez:
fresh hate
From one sick nut to another, I've always considered you to be a safe and, yes, even courteous driver. It's those
OTHER NUTS we have to look out for...

Angry Anarchy's Reply:
Subject: God, etc.
Hey you dumb wit dip shit, guess what, if you really were one of "God's Children" I wouldn't have to say this. The bible says that we are all God's children, and we should love one another as we love ourselves. I would quote more, but I got sick of that whiney pathetic bullshit and threw my bible away. Well anways thank you for posting, Mistina and also thanks for proving that you're a total fucking idiot and also a POSER OF A CHRISTIAN all by yourself, saving PPX  and his fans the time it would require to do so.
Also to comment on other posts, PPX IS NOT A FUCKING CULT, he is doing what he likes to do. If other people choose to have the same attitude about life and what not then its their personal choice..Its just a way of life.  He isn't coming to their houses, tying them up and torturing them by shoving red hot screw drivers through their eyes forcing them to have his views on life. Also, he isn't trying to purposely pissing people off with his website. He put up a website and is putting stuff up that is entertaining to him or have some other value otherwise i doubt he'd have the damn thing. If you don't fucking like it, and can't appreciate a really kick ass site, then your brain must be clogged up with fucking Methaphetamine contaminations. Oh and also...

Salty Dog says:
Dear Mr Popeye-x Your flame page sucks, my old eyes cant make out the text cause of the fucking flames !!So there ! Nyaaah !

Dr. Popeye X comments:
No problem, I'll just send you the URL for my Braille version of this page, you dirty old blind bastard.

Suzi says:
Salty Dog's Old Eyes
Hey , you blind fuck, wear protective eye gear.

Xavier_XXX says:
you are one sad little prick! dont you have anything better to do but wright shit web pages and piss me off! why dont you do what you fucking americans normally do and collect base ball cards and comics. you are the scum of the earth and all that you stand for sucks arse!!!!!!! death to you!!!!!! suck dick!!!!!

Dr. Popeye X comments:
Well, well, well, it seems another limey bastard has got his tail-feathers in
a tussle. Hey, Xavier... FUCK YOU, you goddamn faggot. I don't collect baseball cards, I collect dried up English cunts on a popsicle stick. Fuck ANYBODY who disagrees with the GENIUS contained in the Toiletside Reader. Too bad you aren't in Texas, I'd wring your fucking scrawny little British neck. Chickenshit bastard. Take those X's out of your name, you're like a shit stain, crawlng out of the Internet's butt.

Kyle says:
To hell with that Brit
piece of shit. If it wasn't for the USA, they would have starved to death in the late 30's early 40's. This idiot wouldn't know humor if it bit him on the ass.

Kevin says:
These people seem to have problems way bigger than ours! Man, it gives me a feeling that there's still a little hope for us in this world. These are the kinds of people that should never take any drugs - not even menthol cigarettes! I've heard it said that about 28% of the people in the world are
assholes. It seems to me that a large number of these people have computers. Flame out.

Richard says:
Tell Xavier to go back home and
Xasturbate like he usually does.

Amanda says:
Subject - what the fuck is wrong with you people?
I totally and utterly disagree with your whole "cult" or whatever. What the fuck is wrong with you people, you're not liked by anyone because you say FUCK THE WORLD all the time. If you opened your fucking eyes a little you would see how nice some people really are. FTW is just a group of unstable assholes that were looking for someone for support and unfortunately looked to you. I know these kids Erich, Dan, Joe and like all the other fucked up assholes in my school well anyway, Erich used to be nice and he's just a psychopathic loser with his dick in his mouth just like all of you freaks. I think that you should be ashamed of yourself for having this cult around... your gonna be the cause of a lot of young people's death.

Dr. Popeye X explains:
Actually, Amanda, I agree with everything you said. Little bastards like Erich, Dan, and Joe can die and go to Hell with their dicks in their mouths for all I care. The FTW Cult has such a vast audience, I think it can afford to lose a few fans here and there, don't you? I like the idea of causing a "lot of young people's death", no way am I ashamed of that! What do you think WAR is all about? It makes me sad that a "young girl" totally and utterly disagrees with me, but, I think I'll survive. My advice to you, and all young people: Don't follow ANY cult, its a bunch of BULLSHIT! Make up your own minds about everything, and stick to your guns, even if it means disagreeing with Dr. Popeye X. By the way, my paticular FTW stands for Friendly To Women, I don't know who these other imitators are.

Nemesis whines:
Subject - Sludge
Sewage, real simple... Go to school... you are about 19 right?

Dr. Popeye X admits:
Yeah, and you are a piece of shit that floated to the top momentarily, then sank out of sight. Bye.

why you love to hate popeye-x

don't forget to see:

back to the top

The Toiletside Reader
by Dr. Popeye X
Kurt Otto